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A good laugh is great medicine


 Oh No
 

The lady was a Southern Baptist who attended services and taught Sunday School every week. On one Sunday, an out of town acquaintance, a gentleman, was in the pew right behind her.

He noted what a fine looking woman she was. While they were taking up the collection, the man leaned forward and said,"Hey, how about you and I having dinner on Tuesday?"

"Why Yes, that would be nice," the lady responded.

Well, the gentleman couldn't believe his luck. On Tuesday he picked the lady up and took her to the finest restaurant in that part of South Carolina.

When they sat down, the gentleman looked over at her and suggested, "Would you like a cocktail before dinner?"

"Oh, no," said our circumspect fine example of southern womanhood, "What ever would I tell my Sunday School class?"

Well, our gentleman was setback a bit, so he didn't say much until after dinner. When he pulled out a pack of cigarettes and asked, "Would you like a smoke?"

"Oh my goodness no!," said the woman "I couldn't face my Sunday School class if I did."

Our boy felt pretty low after that, so they left, got in his car and as he was driving the lady home, they passed the local Holiday Inn.

He'd been morally rebuffed twice already, so he figured he had nothing to lose so he ventured forth with, "Ahhh . mmmm how would you like to stop at this motel?"

"Sure, that would be nice," she said in anticipation.

The gentleman couldn't believe his ears, and did a fast U turn right then and there and drove back to the motel and checked in.

The next morning after a wild and passionate night, the gentleman awoke first. He looked at the lovely Dixie darling lying there in the bed and with remorse thought, "What have I done?

He shook her awake and pleaded, "I've got to ask you one thing, whatever are you going to tell your Sunday School class?"

The lady said, "The same thing I always tell them. 'You don't have to smoke and drink to have a good time'.

 

Posted by Topaz at 8:50 AM - 25 Comments   Add a Comment  
 

 Ha...Ha
 

The Talking Monkey

 


A police officer came upon a terrible wreck where the driver and passenger had been killed. As he looked upon the wreckage a little monkey came out of the brush and hopped around the crashed car. The officer looked down at the monkey and said, "I wish you could talk."
The monkey looked up at the officer and shook his head up and down. "You can understand what I'm saying?" asked the officer.

Again, the monkey shook his head up and down.

"Well, did you see this?"
"Yes," motioned the monkey.

"What happened?"
The monkey pretended to have a can in his hand and turned it up by his mouth.

"They were drinking?" asked the officer.
The monkey shakes his head "Yes."

"What else?"
The monkey pinched his fingers together and held them to his mouth.

"They were smoking marijuana?"
The monkey shakes his head "Yes."

"What else?"
The monkey motioned "kissing."

"They were kissing, too?" asked the astounded officer.
The monkey shakes his head "Yes."

"Now wait, you're saying your owners were drinking, smoking and kissing before they wrecked."
The monkey shakes his head "Yes."

"What were you doing during all this?"
"Driving" motioned the monkey.

 



Posted by Topaz at 12:19 AM - 29 Comments   Add a Comment  
 

 Howdy
 

 

Thought I'd check in on you to see if you are at your computer...yep...there you are.....

Have a wonderful day !

Posted by Topaz at 8:36 AM - 28 Comments   Add a Comment  
 

 Wow!!
 

Brand Spankin' New Motorcycle Released in Texas!!

 

 

 

A COWASAKI !!

Posted by Topaz at 7:18 AM - 34 Comments   Add a Comment  
 

 Chicken Sandwiches
 

Don't eat chicken sandwiches, no matter what.....


A little boy and a little girl attended the same school and became
friends. Every day they would sit together to eat their lunch. They
discovered that they both brought chicken sandwiches every day! This
went on all through the fourth and fifth grades, until one day he
noticed that her sandwich wasn't a chicken sandwich.


He said, "Hey, how come you're not eating chicken, don't you like it
anymore?"


She said "I love it but I have to stop eating it." "Why?" he asked.


She pointed to her lap and said "Cause I'm starting to grow little
feathers down there!"


"Let me see" he said. "Okay" and she pulled up her skirt. He looked and
said, "That's right. You are! Better not eat any more chicken."


He kept eating his chicken sandwiches until one day he brought peanut
butter. He said to the little girl, "I have to stop eating chicken
sandwiches, I'm starting to get feathers down there too!"


She asked if she could look, so he pulled down his pants for her.


She said "Oh, my God, it's too late for you! You've already got the neck and the gizzards

Posted by Topaz at 8:44 AM - 26 Comments   Add a Comment  
 
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Author: Topaz
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Life is full of heartaches-laughter will help to deal with the stress.
 
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